basilmemories (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
basilmemories) wrote2009-04-06 02:09 pm
basilmemories) wrote2009-04-06 02:09 pm
Seriously Karma, let's talk.
I know I've done shit things in my life and pretty much am getting what's coming to me, but can't I do this on an installment plan or something?
Mom has to make 70$ last until the 20th at least, and right away when I suggest she cuts out the alcohol (a good 10-20$ every few days), I get bitched at. I have to make sacrifices and eat cheap and possibly give up one of the few creature comforts I have (aka cheap-ass conditioner so my hair isn't a damn rat's nest when I wake up). Why can't she give up the bottle for two weeks?
No I understand her being in pain all the time, there's been times where my mouth and teeth have hurt so badly that I can't sleep even when I want to. But I can't get medical insurance right now, and I don't even have the 6$ it would take for me to make one trip to try and get a handout from the government, much less the number of times you have to wait in line before you might get lucky.
Fuck it, I can't stop crying and things aren't going to get any better. if she won't take a bullet so that both of us will be able to eat, I might as well go out tomorrow and get stinkin' plastered myself. Hopefully I'll end up with a bad batch of something and I'll end up in the hospital. If I'm not going to make a name for myself and end up in even more debt, I might as well do it in comfort.
Mom has to make 70$ last until the 20th at least, and right away when I suggest she cuts out the alcohol (a good 10-20$ every few days), I get bitched at. I have to make sacrifices and eat cheap and possibly give up one of the few creature comforts I have (aka cheap-ass conditioner so my hair isn't a damn rat's nest when I wake up). Why can't she give up the bottle for two weeks?
No I understand her being in pain all the time, there's been times where my mouth and teeth have hurt so badly that I can't sleep even when I want to. But I can't get medical insurance right now, and I don't even have the 6$ it would take for me to make one trip to try and get a handout from the government, much less the number of times you have to wait in line before you might get lucky.
Fuck it, I can't stop crying and things aren't going to get any better. if she won't take a bullet so that both of us will be able to eat, I might as well go out tomorrow and get stinkin' plastered myself. Hopefully I'll end up with a bad batch of something and I'll end up in the hospital. If I'm not going to make a name for myself and end up in even more debt, I might as well do it in comfort.
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I wish I could help. I really, truly do. You really don't deserve that kind of childish bullshit from anyone, much less your own mother.
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But seriously, I know you've been having it rough and i really wish you would come and talk to me about it...I kinda lost me job too. Yaaay...Fucking beautiful... Well, the point is, I'm available now. Jourdan and me are going to the city next week. Come with. I'll buy you dinner. Nothing too expensive tho, k? ^.^ Maybe I'll get you something in japan town if I have enough in my account...
just remember, call me ok? Im always willing to talk, even if its 2am